Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Is the ability to accept things helpful in your slavery?

This question, for jaelina, can be taken on so many different paths.  Acceptance has so many different avenues to explore, and just by this question, she can see two ways for her to with it.  girl will attempt to cover both in this entry. 

To take us down the first path; acceptance is something that, when dealing with others in the lifestyle, comes quite easy to jaelina.  Just because someone does not live the lifestyle the same way that Master and one does, is no reason to cast judgement or to say that said person isn't a "true lifestyler".  When Master and she meet someone new at a lifestyle event, rather it be a munch, public, or private play party, we are the kind that wait to be walked up to.  We admit that we do not go out of our way to get to know people.  We do get a lot of judgement because of the way that Master leads us to live the lifestyle, which in many ways, is very "old school".  For this reason and others, we are pretty careful with whom we call friends.

On the subject, we have a wide variety of "lifestylers" as our friends.  A few are high protocol oriented, just as Master and girl are.  Also, many of our friends are not protocol oriented.  A few are not monogamous as Master and His slave are, but they are friends none-the-less and we do not think any less of them.  Unfortunately the world has made so many limitations in relationships.  So many things that society calls wrong or "improper".

As a part of the BDSM community, how can one judge an other's kink, when in society calls jaelina's "kink" wrong?  As a community member, both Master and jaelina believe that we should be supporters, not judges.  Of course, you have those moments at a party, or when looking at a picture and a shocked expression takes her face.  jaelina might even make a comment "oh God that is so wrong!" but that does not mean she doesn't accept it.  It only means that it is not something girl could do, or may not ever want to do.


Now, taking us down the next path;  in jaelina's service to her Master, acceptance is not always so easy.  On more day to day issues, immediate acceptance comes as a difficult task for her, at times.  Now, she does not mean that she doesn't accept her place as her Master's slave.  That acceptance came long ago, and grows each and every day.  The acceptance she speaks of is the one which comes with momentary tasks, and usually comes when jaelina second-guesses. 

Second guessing is and always has been an insecurity of jaelina's. Many times Master will give her an order, and she will over think the order and begin asking questions instead of accepting and moving to complete the task.  Master is of the mindset, complete the task and then ask questions (of course unless she feels the order would cause her harm, which she doubts will ever happen).  A lot of times she will get an order from Master that may be excusing her from a certain task due to a circumstance out of either Master's or jaelina's control, and she answers many times with "are You sure Master?"  Which usually is responded with a sharp smack to her rump or a firm glare, wordless.

The problem with acceptance normally comes with an order which goes against what Master routinely desires.  It is almost like maybe it is the change.  Certainly it is something girl works hard on each and every day.  Something she strives to do better with, and is probably one of the most important issues she feels she needs to address head on, as it can sometimes lead to other problems.

Please be most well,

Master William's beloved slave, slave jaelina.

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

What is your biggest pet peeve topic from FetLife?

"What is your biggest pet peeve topic from FetLife?"

Strangely enough, jaelina's biggest pet peeve topic on FetLife is third person.  It seems that ninety percent of the replies given on this topic are negative responses about how third person erases the slave's personality.  she can understand where this thought process comes from, as some Masters/Mistresses/Dominants do use third person for this reason, but not All do, and it seems that many fail to realize this.  jaelina has even recieved e-mails on Fet Life stating that she would be avoided because she speaks in third person and there for *must* have no personality.

It is sad to her, that so many have this opinion of the use of third person speech as in her personal experience with using third person, it has not only *not* taken away her personality but it has enhanced her personality.  When she refers to herself in the third person, she is not saying that she, as a person, does not exsist.  For jaelina it is merely a physical representation of her place as a slave to her Master.  For her, jaelina, the girl who speaks in third person, the one who gives her devotion and love to her Master, the one who feels that serving her Master is her purpose in life, *is* who she is.  Being a slave *is* her personality because it is who she wants to be.  Not because her Master has forced her into submitting, or broken her down so low that she no longer has any self asteem.  The truth of the matter is that she has much more of a self asteem than she had when she entered into this relationship with her Master.

Another thing that is said alot is that it is annoying to read or hear, and many have said they avoid speaking to one who does use third person.  In her opinion, they are losing out on the possibilty of making a meaningful friendship.  Just because one speaks in third person does not mean she has no opinions or experiences on and in life.  In fact, she has many opinions because her Master allows them. 

Also, it has been said that the use of third person makes the slave appear ignorant.  If anyone has ever used third person for an extended period of time, or even a short period of time, they would know that using third person correctly takes intelligence and creativity.  her Master certainly has not instructed her to speak in third person to "dumb her down".  If He wanted to do that, would He not simply restrict her from speaking, reading, or having any real experiences?  Instead, jaelina's Master does the exact opposite.  He encourages her to talk with others, to give her opinions and to read and learn.

Lastly, how does speaking in third person impose another's protocols on other people?  Is one asking that person to speak back to her in third person, or even to agree with her use of third person?  No.  Simply, she asks that people respect her Master's decision to instruct her to use third person and realize that it is not about them.  In any Master and slave relationship, it is about the Master.  So if the Master has chosen said protocol, and the slave is doing so to please Him, and even herself, why should it bother anyone else?

Just a few thoughts to ponder.  Thank you for reading.

Master ShenLong's slavegirl, slave jaelina.

Greetings and welcome to jaelina's life.

Recently jaelina has found herself (with her Master's permission) replying to alot of the journal prompts posted on the net, in her personal, hand-written journal that she writes in each evening for her Master.  After writing on a few, she thought that it might be nice to post her answers to said prompts publicly, so that others within the lifestyle can read them and share thier opinions, etc.  Master has allowed this, and so here she is, creating a blog.

To let her readers know a little about her; jaelina is a twenty-four-seven live in, service oriented slave to her Master and Husband.  she has lived with Master for a little over two years as His slave.  Master and she live a high protocol Master/slave dynamic both in private as well as in the public eye.  We have never found a reason to hide our relationship due to having no children, and not working in a career that would frown upon our relationship. 

As you can see, jaelina speaks in third person.  It is a requirement of her Master and something that jaelina embraces whole-heartedly as she believes it has enhanced her personality as both a woman and a slave.  she also Uppercases Master, Him, His, He, when speaking of her Master, and lowercases anything when refering to herself.  If this is a problem for you as a reader, please feel free to move to the next blog.

Also, as jaelina does keep a nightly journal in real life, this blog will only be for journal prompts.  she hopes that her readers enjoy and can perhaps even learn from her responses.  Please feel free to leave comments.

Please be most well,

Master ShenLong's beloved slavegirl, slave jaelina.
Why do you write journals?  Do you find it a posative thing for you, and if so, in what way?  Is it a public journal?  Do you ever find yourself censoring your writings for whoever else might read them?
Question #1:  Why do you write journals?
Answer:  jaelina writes journals so that anything that happens in Oour lives/ Oour life, is recorded and the memories Wwe have shared will always be captured in ink.  Another reason that she writes her journals is because it releases negative and posative emotions.
Question #2:  Do you find it a posative thing for you, and if so, in what way?
Answer:  girl does find writing everything out a very posative thing for her and also for You, Master.  It is posative because no matter the emotions attatched to whatever she may be writing about, they get out and hopefully dont feel so overwhelming.  Also, journaling helps Uus Bboth because sometimes writing things gets more out than talking because writing gives her time to think about what she writes about.  It also comes out so much more like she means it to come out.
Question #3:  Is it a public journal?
Answer:  It is *not* a public journal.  The reason for this leads into the next question.
Question #4:  Do you ever find yourself censoring your writings for whoever else might read them?
Answer:  jaelina woudl change the words "for whoever else might read them" to "from whoever else might read them."  Simply because yes she does catch herself kind of restricting what she see's, feels, etc. when it is *very* deep, sexual, passionate because she does concern herself, with the fact that her family has read her journals in the past, and for her that cheapens the feelings, dirties them because they cannot understand fully in thier heart, the emotions, and special moments.  It's like someone having the ability to read her heart and soul.  No one but the One that her heart beats for, the One that her soul soars for can truly understand these feelings.  That might sound over romanticized or poetic, but it really is the way it feels.  It isnt that she doesnt want people to know the passion, but like she said, people that do not have the ability to understand it, cheapen it by judgement and personal beliefs/opinions.
Master ShenLong's jaelina